Avoid unnecessary confrontations- 20 ways to stylishly tell her “it is over”

Many a time, guys find themselves in the dire situation of not knowing how to tell their woman “it is over” some fearing the ripple effect this might result to; continue to pretend and stay in an unfulfilled relationship.

Well as a man, you really need to start to get a grip on how to do some things, especially how to handle a woman. If you cannot take charge of your affairs and relationships, this can affect the overall attitude you put to other important things in your life.

One of the situations you need to grapple with fast, is how to tell a woman “it is over” when it really glaring that you can keep going on with the mishap you call a relationship,

So sit back and relax let me treat you to a rich course in what I term as “emotional euphemism”- that is saying and acting out unpleasant things in a rather pleasing and confounding manner to the woman you feel has become a big surplus to requirement. below are twenty tested tips on how to stealthily break up without creating chaos and misunderstanding coupled with bodily harm and emotional trauma getting in the way.
 Read on…

1.  Call her less: women generally crave for attention, and one way of showing this is true regular calls. A woman wants you to call her just to tell her the flimsiest of things, they expect your call just to hear you tell them how deeply you love them; they hope to see your call just to say “I love you”. But when you reduce these calls, it sends some signals. It makes her wonder if you don’t fancy her anymore. It freaks her out as she imagines in her freaky mind's eye you calling another woman instead of her. There’s this particular sister I pretty much don’t fancy, I met her true another female relative of mine. This lady do not meet my standards in a woman, technically speaking she was too demanding that I find her irritating (sorry sisters reading this as I don’t mean to insult your sensibilities). I tried to see if she’ll on her own notice my disinterest in her. To make this crystal clear, I stopped calling her as frequent like I used to when we first met. When she noticed this, she complained; after which I stopped calling her at all. After finding out that her complaints  cannot change the situation but rather aggravate it, she got the message and moved on. This is the power of lesser calls, so learn how to use.  
2. Avoid her: this might be really hard especially if you live in the same neighborhood with her. But if you know how, then it is easy-peasy. To achieve this, avoid regular places she hangs out, avoid her friends and acquaintances, if you are living together which I fear you are not- then it is time you moved in with another friend, relative or even a female friend. Just do anything that will make her come into less contact with you. If she somehow protests of the situation, make up stories like “I’ve been so busy lately…”  “I really need to create more time for my job”. When you tell her things like this after she notices your frequent absence, if she is wise enough she’ll understand it is time she  considers giving some heads up to the  the new guy wooing her.  
3.  Cancel date nights: one thing I know about women aside having you tell them how beautiful they are is they love outings and dates. A woman hates it when she’s stood over. One way to make it clear and conspicuous that you are not in need of her anymore is cancelling date nights at your favorite rendezvous. women love being the cynosure of all eyes, they like to portray the image that they are currently the happiest woman alive because she is with the most reliable man in the whole wide world that treat her like a queen. the one place where she can always flaunt this good fortune of hers is on dates at cool and even odd places where other people get together; now imagine the cataclysm you must have caused by cancelling important moments like dates and more so  doing this at every turn.
4. Talk more about your job/career: When she starts getting less attention as your job and career gets more precedence over her, this is another clear indicator that you’ve begin developing cold feet over your relationship with her. Then you constantly shelve any ideas and any form of dialogue that she raises on how you both can move your relationship forward. but you should alternatively chip in issues and matters that concerns only how you can move up your career ladder and stuffs like that. With this steadily dominating the scenario, if she is really wise and sensitive she’ll understand it is time to get on with her boring life.  
5.  Flirt with her friends: I wonder which woman will love seeing her man rudely enmeshed in the company of her friends catching so much fun instead of spending time with her. Well this is how it really is when you get closer to her friends.You send the message loud and clear with your actions in substitute to using words that will warrant unnecessary confrontations that should easily be avoided. If you even want to make it worse, never discuss issues that concerns her while in the company of any of the friends you are hanging out. Women talk a lot, and the little things we might regard as unimportant could mean a million dollar essence to them. So imagine when this particular friend of hers you hanged out with comes back to give her a vivid detail of her outing in your company, and seriously she got no mention of any sort in the conversation this her friend had with you. When this friend tell her this, she can fizzle out without you even noticing (not in all cases as some women might prefer going down fighting for what they feel is theirs). With the constant flirting with every available female becoming the norm- you are secretly telling “I’m no longer your type- bounce… please”.
   
6. Take vacations without her: Ladies love special moments spent in the company of the man they love and cherish. One of such moments will be taking vacations to fun spots either within or around the globe. Now picture how she feels after learning you left for such wonderful spots without her. This is another silent pointer that it is actually over between you both. To add some salt to injury, you can leave for this vacation in the company of another woman- her friend, colleague, female friend, female cousin or even her own sister senior or junior. This reminds me of TV series Arrows where the hero Oliver Queens left for vacation with his girlfriend’s sister only to lose her to a boat accident that left the girlfriend’s sister for dead which got his girlfriend so sick and mad with him. Depriving her of such momentary and rare fun gets her really hurt and under-appreciated (I wonder what that means?).  
7. Hang out more with the boys: One of the things that killed American song diva and Grammy Award winning singer cum song writer-Whitney Houston, was Bobby Brown's penchant for hanging out with the boys and totally neglecting her. Not that you need to go to these extremes as I don’t want my advice to lead to any sort of suicide or bodily harm. So if you must do this, you need to apply some caution that is if you really want to get the full effect of this action. So spending more time in the company of childhood friends, male colleagues and relatives; you are gradually revealing your intentions without you voicing it out. Remember this action will mean one thing” you bore me to hell…I’d prefer hanging with broads instead of getting frustrated with your sorry and boring ass…”. Yes this is what this action literally means.  
8.  Never reply her compliments: “oh you look so handsome in those ties…” “Whoa! You sure look so good that I don’t mind having you for dinner…” “geez! You sound so sweet I wish I can melt away to the sound of your voice…” when you constantly ignore her compliments, you are just silently regarding those compliments as underserving and rather unnecessary and should be stopped forthwith. I remember this lady I was finding so unsavory and needed a little space from her as she was really a demanding bit$$$$ch. She always used this kind of remarks to cajole me into giving in to her demands. But when she noticed her hypnotic and feminine wiles where no longer working on me, she had only one option which was- bounce or stay and get humiliated. this what it feels like ignoring her with her subtle compliments.
   
9. Avoid eye contact with her when you talk:  Eye contact with a loved one depicts connectivity and trust. When you deliberately avoid getting to look her in the eyes like you used to; you practically get her estranged from you. If this is consciously sustained overtime, both of you inadvertently becomes strangers. Nothing can be more effective than getting her to be strangers with you and ultimately getting her outta your life carefully and succinctly.  
10. Show less concern about her welfare: One thing that endears a man to her woman is showing so much concern and care to anything pertaining to her happiness and general well being. From her family, job, pets, friends, religious beliefs, personal philosophy and just anything that defines her character and relationships. Just show a little indifference to any of these areas that concerns her, and you’ll notice a really jittery and agitated woman. Now make this a policy to remain as unconcerned as possible to all that points to her welfare and well-being. I don’t need to say more as your action can put her to her place- which is out of your life.  
11. Never talk about any of her family member: Making reference to her family members one way or the other makes a woman secured and comfortable with you. I remember this friend of mine who had this lady whose only concern in life was her nuclear family members (I wonder who doesn’t have family at heart?). Though I find this so sweet, but she really took it to the extremes by chatting, wining, nagging and even fighting when anything that concerns her family comes up to the utter dismay of those around her and this friend of mine. It got to the extent that my friend now regarded her as an irritant and a disturbance to his peace and happiness. Then he vowed to extricate himself from this lady’s firm grip and consulted me as usual. I asked him if he took part in conversations bothering this sister’s family and he answered in the affirmative. And I gave him the best advise on how to take care of this unfortunate situation. I made him understand the need to reduce his involvement in her tantrums by ignoring her conversations of anything that revolves around her family, when he took this counsel hook, line and sinker he saw how amazing this style was. Make sure you do it every time and don't forget to frown your face or make your face rather gloomy and expressionless. If you doubt me on the efficacy of this tactic, you can take me up on this one and I assure you I'll prevail, trust me.  
12. Reduce how you spend the night in the apartment you share: If for some reason you are living in the same apartment with her, don’t you  think it will be more appropriate you moved out or better still reduce drastically the number of nights spent in the shared apartment? You can start by skipping weekends, from weekends to ordinary days and then… well you can fill in the gaps.  
13. Get drunk once in a while:  I occasionally like carousing and drinking wild with some of my wacky friends when I find any lady around me at any giving time or moment bitchy and nagging. If you happen to find yourself in an unfulfilling relationship and for every sane reason want to get quickly out to keep your sanity, then do this- go out and get drunk. Why this tactic can be very effective is this- in your drunken state tell her the obvious without mincing words. If you find her unattractive, then say it while still drunk, if your sex like is boring this is the time to tell her the details why you find her sloppy in bed, if her family and relatives are meddling in your affairs, what better time to tell her this if not now that you are drunk to stupor. Being drunk can become the tool to ease her gradually out of your boring life. However never get too drunk or you might just get your reputation messed up and the very essence that necessitated your actions distorted, so do it properly and reap the benefits by getting her permanently outta your life so easily with a couple of drinks…   
14. Keep late nights: Drinking will not only suffice, so you can add more to your list of distasteful pastime like- keeping late nights. When you start staying away from her through actions like this; you are strategically making it clear that you find her quite displeasing and you deserve better. Keeping late nights can suggest many things. From seeing another woman to taking more pleasure in your work rather than her or simply put-you are transforming into an ogre who prefers staying alone in solitude. Women need our attention especially during cold nights and bad days. When you starve her of this attention by staying deep into the nights in only-god-knows-where, you are just are lucidly saying- “please woman I need my space, can I have it...”   
15. Put on a stern face, but never frown or even hiss: Being expressionless and somewhat indifferent to things going on around you while in her presence can be a potent tool in your arsenal of it-is-over-type tactics if you know how to use it. Good enough I'm blessed with this very stern looking face than can send jitters down the spine of anybody I plan to look mean to.but you can still replicate this stern-looking-effect if you have a clownish or friendly face by learning how to mask the entire features of your face like your smile, frown, dimples (if you’ve got one), displeasures and even anger. Employing this mean-looking face strategy will sure send a very dangerous signal to her that things between the both of you are no longer rosy. While doing this, make sure you eschew any form of bitterness in your soul; never let it reflect as it might be mistaken for something else. Never hiss, howl or holler. Just be plain and straight. Remember, While doing this never you ignore her conversations, but take part in it as long as it is healthy. Nonetheless make this conversation formal and professional to drive home your point (stern looking face I mean).   
16. Avoid kissing her: One thing I’ve noticed in most of the ladies I’ve been with is their fondness for exchanging kisses at every god given opportunity. They kiss you when you are leaving for work, going to bed, traveling, to show how they missed you, showing you how deeply affected they are being around you or just any flimsy reason that will make her want to spit lovingly into your mouth. But when you begin to reduce the number of kisses you give and receive, it throws her off balance. This is what many guys do when they feel their relationship is becoming extraneous and heavily becoming a burden to their tired shoulders. You can as well try it and see how effective this can be.    
17. Talk about her Imperfections: “gosh! Your nose are so big and I find it disturbing to look at…” “damn! I wish you looked like Beyonce, not like your long faced mum” “ yikes! I know you are too slow to catch up…” “oh my God! Look at how ignorant you are…” and just any comment that will make her look timid and very stupid. If she cooks a meal, you complain of the salt, if she brushes her hair, you wine about using your comb instead of hers. When you keep nagging like this like a bitch in heat; you begin to look menacing to her and if she is pretty fast if figuring things out and not as dumb as you complained, then it is the time for her to do the most honorable thing- walk.  
18. Move out of the House: Many men these days who unfortunately find themselves living with an unpleasant partner prefer moving out instead of the other way round. Though some will rather chase the woman out if he rented or own the apartment, doing this has resulted in many men losing heavily in alimony related litigation and suitcases. But being wise and moving out instead should be the wise choice in getting her expertly outta of your sorry ass life.  
19. Starve her of Sex: This is supposed to be the number one point but I rather saved it for number nineteen for some reasons. Sex is the very backbone that holds any relationship. When the sex becomes boring or non-existent it molds that relationship into something very cold and unassuming. Sex is connection and women feel differently about sex than men. When you deliberately deny her of sex, you deny her of any sort of emotional and mutual connection with you. I’ve seen many men and women walk out of relationships for the simple reason of poor and unsatisfactory sex   
20.  Call her and tell her: Well when all these tactics are employed and still she decides to stay on against all odds, then it is time to tell her in plain simple English- “it is over…” if you can’t muster the courage to do so, then you can employ the services of a friend, relative, Relationship expert or counselor if you want to save some face and avoid some hot slaps and maybe blows .

Whatever you do bro, make sure you don’t get a woman to do anything drastic and life threatening. Remember “hell hath no fury like a woman scorned!”…

15 THINGS YOU MUST NEVER SAY TO HER ON THE FIRST DATE

15 THINGS YOU MUST NEVER SAY TO HER ON THE FIRST DATE

Women are quite sensitive and easily read meanings into everything a guy says, especially a guy that she is really into. Like the say- first impression matters a lot; so for this sane reason a guy must understand the psyche of a woman he is out with on a first date. Understanding her implies so many things- from what she likes; those things that can transform her mood from happy to sad, what type of discussions she abhors and just anything that can ruin an evening out with that dream girl.

While doing this, you need to figure out what is proper to say and what is inappropriate.  This is what this article will be looking into as I list 15 frequently disturbing things women generally hate to be asked or told that can create a negative impression of  the  man she once thought was the man of her  dreams.

1. How old are you? One thing I’ve noticed about women in my many years of dealing with them is that they love being called babies showing you how age conscious they are. So asking her how old she is especially on the first date might be misconstrued for something out of context. It would seem like you are actually telling her she is too old for you. I still recall this one time I asked a female friend of mine that I was out with on what I call a “how are you date?” (wonder what that even means), how old she was- this lady almost blew the top of the roof with her rants and tantrums as she felt some of her friends must have told me how old she is or whatever the hell she was truly thinking. It took some pretty useful time and effort to calm her down as I expertly and subtly talked her back into some healthy good mood. So if you must know this my young man for purpose of clarity- never ask any lady how old she is, however you can slyly use euphemisms like “when did you graduate from high school?”, “did you watch this TV program…?” and just any question that depicts time and season. From the answers she gives based on the above type of questions, you can ingeniously fathom, out her real age. 
2. Are you a Virgin? How dare you ask this from a lady on a first date? Well I don’t need to tell you what is going to happen when you do. But on the flip side, if you haven’t asked this kind of question on a first date, so please save yourself from an evening of embarrassment and keep this question faraway. Is like asking a nun how she felt from her first kiss; or asking a gay man what it is like sleeping with a woman. Just imagine the scenario, can you picture it? Then you can now understand the implication of doing this. There was this particular lady I had a date with, well it was a double date with another friend of mine- this friend of mine for lack of what to say or plain timidity or should I call it misguided inquisitiveness; he asked his lady friend if she was a virgin. This ruined the whole date, as my own lady friend felt maybe I somehow had something to do with this a conspiracy of some sort. On a serious note, just save this question for another day, maybe in the heat of passion or when the relationship must have gone strong and developed some foothold. 
3.  Oh! My Ex Looks like you: another spoiler that can make an already bad situation worse. Women from study hate being compared to another woman. Recently I was having this discussion with a female relative of mine and I was actually telling her something about an ex-girlfriend of mine and I made some comparison of her character and mien with the said lady. She blew her top and warned me sternly to desist comparing her with another woman, not just any woman but one I had a negative history with. This will give you a clear and vivid picture of how it will be telling a lady you are planning to have as a lover or even wife that she shares some physical features or attributes with an ex-girlfriend. It is like telling her that she is no better than this ex. It also depicts some packets of affection and connection with the ex. So please keep the conversation within what concerns the both of you and how you can move your relationship forward. Talking or comparing an ex can create unnecessary tension that would have been avoided if you had sealed you mouth on such a frivolous and extraneous topic.  
4.  Hey! You look so lean: women get easily carried away when you flatter them about their looks. Even the most terrible of the female specie feel on top of the world when you treat and regard her as a queen especially when you make reference of how good she looks even comparing her to Aphrodite or Calypso. Please never tell a woman that she looks sick in any way, I was told a woman how she looked lean and frail like a pregnant woman, oblivious to me this lady was actually pregnant for a man out of wedlock. This ruined my once friendly relationship I had with this lady. Even if she looked lean or sickly, there are better ways to say this. You can say, “…hey baby you look cool, it’s like you are on diet?” Or “you look a little stressed out; don’t you think you should rest more?” Avoid saying things as they actually are especially when it concerns a lady, more so on a first date. This will make her feel terrible and inferior and as such not good enough for you. This kind of scenario is most common in a blind date. So as a man with good character and decorum, your manner of speech should reflect a profound degree of intellect, civility and class, get a clue. 
5.  You a little taller than my EX: whoa! Yet another first date blunder I see many guys committing day in day out. Like I said above, women and human beings generally hate being compared to another. Know this also, women are very sensitive to height issues, most especially those ones not so lucky with it. To you, it might sound like a compliment, but on the contrary it is actually an insult. Just imagine a lady telling you how her ex was so tall that she had to stand on toes to kiss him? What she is ultimately telling you is that you are short. So my candid advise to you while out on a first date, never make mention of her height in any form or manner in your speech and conversations. I’ve noticed that even the very tall ladies feel uneasy when been compared to a tall runway model. On a sound note bro, stay of heights or risk falling off and breaking your legs -losing her I mean. 
6. I need to call my Mum: seriously are you a baby? Are you still suckling mama’s breasts? I think you are still in diapers? Whatever the case might be, calling your mum on a first date tells her how childish and immature you really are. It also depicts insecurity and fear, it shows you are so attached to mummy that she detects to you when to go out and when not to. Though a little family support is necessary for a relationship to go further, but that attachment must not be so obvious that even a small complain your mum makes of her might lead to you breaking up with her. But this should be greatly avoided on a first date, as any impression you create that tell her that you cannot protect her from family scrutiny especially mama’s, then sorry bro she sure will have the next date with another strong and dependable guy, trust me. 
7.  Can I read your Texts? I need some vestige of freedom while in any relationship. So asking her about every texts that enters her phone while both of you are out can mean pettiness and insecurity on you own side. Women need strong and not insecure men. Men who feel paranoid and pitiful easily find themselves sorted out quick by the ladies. Going through her texts or phone generally on a first date is a date killer which from experience will get you to the bins. Don’t say I didn’t warn you. 
8. Look like you need a mirror: what? Are you out of your mind? How can you in your right mind ask her to take a look at a mirror? Don’t you know you are her mirror? If she has some meat leftovers on her teeth, just stylishly help her remove it. Referring a mirror to her can kill her mood as she might be thinking how badly disheveled she looks. Mirrors are date killers and avoiding topics bordering on them can fetch you a second date, try me. 
9.  My neighbor’s sixteen year old daughter uses the exact earrings you are wearing: can I hear somebody hissing? Women hate it when you make jest of their jewelries or makeup. So using a sixteen year old kid’s fashion apparels and concerns to make an analogy of hers can even earn you a slap on the face especially if you are on a hell date. Instead praise her on how rich her costume is even comparing her clothes and jewelries to that of a celebrity like Oprah, Michelle Obama, Beyonce and not Lady Gaga or Madonna and definitely not a sixteen year old inexperienced chick. 
10.  I lost my Job: which lady will like to hang out with a broke ass? From the place I come from, women avoid jobless and cashless men- I don’t know of you. So telling her you lost your job on a first date is sure going to end the date on a broke note (whatever that means). Explaining your joblessness to her is like telling her how little she should order as you have so little on you and picking the bills might be a little difficult. This is another sign of insecurity and even sheer laziness. Remember women like their men- dependable, hardworking, strong and above all loaded. 
11.   I moved in with my mother? It is better you tell her plain “…I can’t have you sleep over in my place” though harsh but a lot better than telling her how big a sorry ass you are. Which still boils down to being insecure and financially lacking in handling your responsibilities and business. 
12.    Will you marry me? Though every woman will like their relationships leading them down the aisle. But being too frontal especially on the very first outing with her, can make her uneasy and jittery. Women are more emotional than men; they are so fragile particularly those ones who have a history of unfulfilled relationships. So proposing on a first date could get her to trust you less. This is so because she could have this feeling that you are taking advantage of her fragile state to hit her hard on a weak spot. Even if you have the best of intentions as regard marrying this woman, you can save this marriage proposal for a second or even a third date. Though many will disagree with me on this, but it is better safe than sorry. 
13.   I hope your mother Look like you? From my little experience with the women folk, they seem to be more attached to family than we men. So talking about a family member more so her mother in such a manner will surely ruin the nice evening. To her you are just telling her that her mother if not like her can be ugly, and just about any meaning she could read into your mutterings. 
14.    There’s so much salt in this pudding: I’m guilty on this one and so many guys get caught up in this too. I still remember recently how I slammed my plate on the table as a result of the minute food item I was served. I was so angry that I could not control my anger that I had to slam them plates on the table. My lady friend became so embarrassed that she almost worked out on me. Know this; such outburst will suggest two things. The first being that you are not with enough cash and secondly you don’t fancy her and instead of complaining about her looks or anything- you feel you should lash out your frustration on the waiter and lastly you are a plain nag, and will nag her on every of her imperfections. To save her from future heartbreak, she will turn you down for a second date. 
15.   Oh! This was why I hit my Ex: this is the sound and speech of a batterer. No woman will like to stay in an abusive relationship. No sane woman will go out with a man that hits her for the strangest of reasons. So making such remarks puts you in a bad light.

These are some reasons why you are still yet to get hooked permanently with a good woman, there are more reasons, however these are some of the basic ones every guy must avoid while out on a date with his dream girl.